How Do I Talk to My Pro-Choice Friends? 

3 ways to share your pro-life stance 

 By Natasha Smith 

In a polarized culture where conversation is often replaced with shouting, how do we winsomely engage with people of different opinions?  

We asked pro-life apologist and speaker Megan Almon how she would coach pro-lifers to converse with people who are pro-choice. Almon works with Life Training Institute where she speaks in churches, high schools and other events to help individuals understand the logic and arguments surrounding abortion and unborn life. She shared a list of approaches to help discuss the topic of abortion without getting into a heated debate.  

Shift Your Posture 

Abortion in our society is framed as a subjective issue,” Almon said. “This happens when you hear people say, ‘I’d never get an abortion but who am I to say someone else shouldn’t?’” 

Almon notes that when people say this, they’re assuming truth is relative; definable by each individual depending on their own circumstances and values. Our culture tells us there are no universal truths 

But Almon disagrees. She likens this argument to that of slavery. She points out how absurd it would be for us to hear someone say, “I think slavery is wrong, but I shouldn’t tell someone else they can’t own slaves.” 

“When it comes to the issue of abortion, we must remember that this is an objective issue just like those other issues (of slavery). In other words, whether it’s right or wrong doesn’t depend on me,” Almon explains. 

We must shift our posture and present the idea that truth is not something we define and determine for ourselves. The existence of objective truth paves a way to engage in meaningful conversation. 

Ask Good Questions 

When you engage with others in the marketplace of ideas, you must first seek to understand what they believe. Almon suggests three questions to help in this endeavor. They come from Greg Koukle’s book, Tactics.  

Tell me what you mean by that? 

Example: “I’m pro-choice. 

Response: “Tell me what you mean by that? How do you define pro-choice? 

Result: You’ve opened the door for them to define their terms and for you to gather information that will help you understand WHAT they believe. 

Can you tell me the reasons why you hold that view? 

Example: “I’m pro-choice because I believe women deserve to control what happens to their body.” 

Response: “I see. Can you explain how you came to that view?” 

Result: You’ll better understand their reasons for WHY they believe as they do. 

Have you considered X? 

Example: After hearing their reasons for what and why they hold a pro-choice view, perhaps something they said can serve as a platform for this question. Here you invite them to think about more information, but you do so in the form of a question. 

Response: “Have you considered the fact that many women are not fully aware of all their choices before having an abortionStatistics show that over 65 percent of women said they regretted their abortion. Pro-life pregnancy centers make sure women are fully informed about all their options before deciding about their pregnancy. 

Result: You’re able to dialogue about facts and ideas without tearing down the other human being you’re talking with.  

Seek to Understand 

Whenever you talk with people of differing opinions, seek first to understand. Always be kind and respectful to them. Even how you speak to others should be informed by your pro-life view that says EVERY human life has value, even the people who disagree with you. 

Watch Megan Almon’s full explanation.

Subscribe to our Pro-Life Training Channel on YouTube to learn more ways to talk about your pro-life view.  

Learn even more ways to talk about pro-life issues here.