Jimmy Bloss grew up in a small town in West Virginia. His father ran his own business, and his mother worked at the post office. Although Jimmy knew his father loved him, he was rarely present when Jimmy needed him. Jimmy grew up attending church, but at 16, he began living a different lifestyle. His father’s absence caused him pain he chose to suppress with drugs and alcohol. Later Jimmy went to Marshall University. Going to college was another way Jimmy attempted to please his father and get his approval. Here, Jimmy’s life became a whirlwind of sex and drugs, always getting close to the edge but never falling off.
But with one phone call, everything changed.
*Name of Jimmy’s partner has been changed to protect her identity.*
In 1980, Jimmy received a call a few weeks after a one-night stand with a girl named Mary. It was her panicked voice on the phone. She was pregnant. Jimmy was in complete shock. At 20 years old, Jimmy was living a fast-paced life, and he never imagined having a child. Together they made the quick decision to abort the baby. He and Mary visited the nearest abortion clinic in Cincinnati, Ohio. Jimmy remembered seeing a few people who were protesting abortion outside of the clinic as he dropped Mary off. It was a challenging start to a devastating day, “To me, it can’t get much darker than abortion,” Jimmy said as he reflected on his experience that day.
When she returned a few hours later, they told her the results showed she was pregnant, and during the same visit, she got her abortion. Jimmy’s initial feelings after the abortion were numbness. Jimmy didn’t know that day that the guilt and shame of the abortion would follow him for decades.
“Now, when I see a baby, I’m reminded of our decision.”
Mary and Jimmy never got back together after the abortion. They never talked to each other about it. Although Jimmy moved forward with his life, he still carried the weight of the abortion with him. He wouldn’t know the effect it had on Mary until decades later.
God is Still in the Miracle Business
Five years after the abortion, Jimmy married a girl he met on the beach. Life was moving on, and Jimmy began his career, climbing the corporate ladder. On paper, Jimmy was living the dream. He drove a Mercedes, made a lot of money, and lived lavishly. He and his wife had even been blessed with three beautiful boys. In reality, his marriage was on the rocks. Despite success and promotions, Jimmy’s life began to spiral into more depression and anxiety. Eventually, the pressure became too much, and Jimmy was fired.
Jimmy felt hopeless, without purpose, and afraid. Jimmy’s attempt to excel in his career never brought him joy, and the effects of the abortion were still looming over him years later. On Friday, September 5, 2008, Jimmy rented a storage unit in town, parked his car in the building, and pulled down the large metal door. Jimmy took a lethal dose of pills and went to sleep, intending to end his life. Jimmy was found hours later without a heartbeat, and his family was notified of his death. Then God got involved.
While being transported in the ambulance, suddenly, Jimmy’s heartbeat returned. Doctors told his family he might not survive; if he did, he would be a vegetable. Miraculously, his organs had no damage, and Jimmy returned to life in total health. Today Jimmy is passionate about the effects of abortion on mental health and the hope of God to redeem any situation. This miracle taught Jimmy that there’s still hope in God, even in the aftermath of abortion.
The Lasting Effects of Abortion
After God saved Jimmy’s life and he began healing from the abortion, Jimmy could not stop thinking about Mary. It had been about thirty years since they had spoken. He knew he had to talk to her. He found out where she was and called her, unsure whether she would answer. Jimmy waited on the phone nervously to hear if the weight of their abortion had crushed her life as it had crushed his. What Jimmy learned from this conversation was devastating. Jimmy recalled the conversation with Mary:
“She said because of our choice; she chose never to have children. That is the most painful sentence I have ever heard.”
When it comes to abortion, sometimes the truth can be the hardest thing to face. Abortion kills, and not just the baby’s life is lost. Abortion can steal someone of the hope for a better future. It can steal a whole generation of children meant to be born. The effects of abortion are undeniable; this is evident in both Jimmy’s and Mary’s lives. This one decision made at a young age had an irreversible effect that snowballed throughout the lives of both parties.
More Resources for Men
It’s still hard for Jimmy to speak about his experience; however, he continues to share his testimony because he wants people to know about the horrific aftermath of abortion. When Jimmy shares his story, he emphasizes the importance of men standing up and taking responsibility for their actions. Jimmy also speaks out on the importance of men being open about their grieving process after an abortion. He emphasizes the importance of available resources, like our mobile medical units.
“If I had known the aftermath of abortion, I would have never done that. I take responsibility as the man, knowing I should have been wiser than that; it put us both in a whirlwind. I can only imagine if Mary and I had gone to a mobile medical unit and looked at the ultrasound monitor; I wonder what it would have been like if there had been a women’s clinic; would our hearts have turned?”
With the Lord, Any Wound Can Be Healed
Jimmy is passionate about bringing men together to talk about the effects of abortion. Jimmy blames the “macho” image men try to keep for the avoidance of grieving this profound loss. His advice to men with their own abortion stories is to get help. It doesn’t have to be formal counseling; it can look like a conversation with someone you trust. “There is strength in being transparent and real,” Jimmy added. Many men tend to push their feelings down to survive abortion. Jimmy still feels the loss of abortion. Even years later, he says, “Healing from abortion has taught me that God’s forgiven me regardless of my feelings, but the scars remain so deep.”
With the Lord, any wound can be healed, but with something as traumatic as abortion, the scars can remain forever. When abortion becomes unthinkable, we can look forward to a generation of fathers and mothers with fewer scars and more hope. At Save the Storks, we care about saving babies AND families from the heartbreaking results of abortion. If you’re a man who has found himself in an unplanned pregnancy, know that you have what it takes to walk through this. For more encouragement, read the new Dare To Be A Dad ebook by Matt Hammitt. If you want to join the fight for life and help fellow men step into fatherhood with courage, you can read our blog on how you can help men choose fatherhood.
